how to be your own guru

24 Nov 5 Ways to be Your Own Guru

Do you find yourself wondering what you should eat for your most optimum health? You’re pretty sure green smoothies and salads are “good” for you, but beyond that you’re pretty lost. Should you be vegan, vegetarian, carnivorous, gluten-free, paleo…? Are supplements good? If so, which ones? What about drugs – should you take this medication, or that one, or give them up altogether? Maybe you should try kinesiology, or homeopathy?

Do you wonder what the best exercises are for a lean, fit, detoxed body? Are burpees still the ultimate quick-hit for a hot body? You heard a friend recommend weightlifting and wonder if that’s the way forward.

Do you think your meditation practice needs some help to be more effective? You’re not sure that you’re doing it ‘right’ and can’t quieten those damn thoughts! Should you be doing it in a different way or place?

Do you get confused about notions of your ‘true’, inner self and your ‘higher self’? Do you wish someone could just point those out to you directly so you knew exactly what they are and where to find them?

Are you looking for a guru to help you solve all these problems?

Then THIS is your problem!

You keep looking for answers to your inner needs OUTSIDE OF yourself!

You want validation. You want someone – anyone – to tell you what to do!

YOU WANT ANSWERS. And you want them NOW because you’re so damn frustrated that you’re just not “THERE” yet. More than anything I just wanted someone to say 'Here, do THIS and everything will be OK!' Click To Tweet

I understand. And I also understand how IRRITATING and DEPRESSING it can be for someone to say to you:

“NOBODY can tell you what to do!”

I heard those words from my mother when I was about 24 and they sent me into a deep spiral of depression. Already at a low point, just out of a postgrad degree and sending out application after application for jobs, all to no effect; I felt USELESS.

But I had to work it out for myself. Trial and error – and a LOT OF IT!

I’ve also had my fair share of guru-seeking over the years. Even now, I sometimes catch myself thinking, “Just someone pleeeeeeeaase TELL ME what to DO!”

But at heart I know that all I am really missing in those times is CONNECTION with myself. When that connection is live and fully evident, I feel capable of pretty much anything. Don’t know the answer? Haven’t got a clue where to start? Know absolutely NOTHING about this situation/thing? I’ll figure it out…

By trusting. By listening. By trusting a whole lot more, and listening even MORE.

By being totally and unapologetically present with myself.

By NOT looking for gurus. By AVOIDING comparisons with others. By sticking with my own internal compass, come what may.

Sometimes – often in fact – I seek SUPPORT, ideas and opinions. But this is very different from asking for ANSWERS. I do my research, and then follow my gut.

Without that inner compass? You will ALWAYS BE LOST!

You will NEVER know or trust whether you’re on the right path. You will be inconsistent in your approach to diet, exercise, health, home-making, child-rearing, whatever… And you will always, always, ALWAYS feel LACKING.

If you’re still reading this and haven’t gone off into a disgusted or despairing sulk, then 1. I’m pretty darned impressed, and 2. It means you’re probably wondering how on EARTH to start this process (or secret option number 3. You already know all of this, have your methods and are just nodding along wisely). So, to get you started (though by all means don’t feel you HAVE to!), here are 5 Ways to Be Your Own Guru:

  1. STOP TREATING YOUR BODY LIKE AN ENEMY. Those symptoms of pain or itch or excess flab or flatulence of whatever are trying to TELL YOU something important! So listen up, and listen up with optimal intent. Also? Remember at all times that your body is ALSO listening – so what you say to it counts for a LOT. No, really!
  2. START BREATHING. If I could teach just ONE thing to every single person on the planet, it would be how to breathe EFFECTIVELY at different times. This means employing awareness first and foremost – because although breath is an autonomous system, it is seriously affected by stress and low mood, which honestly is pretty much CONSTANT for many of us! Once awareness becomes a habit, then different techniques can be learned to REVOLUTIONISE your life in ANY given situation. No joke. Breathing is not just about oxygen!
  3. DON’T LET YOUR EGO DRIVE. We live in our mental and emotional body pretty much most of the time, which is fine, except for one leeeeetle problem: instead of taking the reins as our objective and far wiser “higher self”, we tend to let our childish and emotionally-disturbed ego drive. We get mired in our repetitive, limiting beliefs, and we lash out when anyone uncovers or pokes our bruised bits. It’s also exhausting letting your ego drive because you’re always left to pick up the mess in her wake, apologise to everyone involved in collisions, and try to figure out how to recover from the stress of it all.
  4. TRUST YOUR GUT. This is NOT the same as listening to your fears, and granted, it does take practice. 3 years ago I honestly had NO IDEA how to listen to my instinctive, intuitive self, though I happened on it by trial and error quite frequently. The first step is to figure out what “yes” and “no” feel like to you; they are different for everyone BUT a “yes” answer is typically lighter, expansive, exciting (maybe even tinged by fear) and free, whereas a “no” answer is usually heavier, constricting, dull or nauseating. Practice with small decisions first!
  5. ADMIRE THE VIEW. Remember, as they say, to smell the roses. Practice gratitude EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. It changes your cells, and most importantly it MAKES YOU FEEL GREAT! Stand on top of your mountain of awesomeness and look out across the landscape. Breathe it in. Feel one with it. Be humble and own your greatness at the same time.

Now you have no excuses! And if you are READY to create a bigger life, up-levelling to your HIGHER SELF and inspiring others to do the same, then I would LOVE you to join my FREE Facebook group, The Secret Sorority of Life Alchemists – where creative, soul-driven women commune, bare their innermost selves and support each other to create BIG CHANGE in a quiet, empowered way.

Namaste,
Zoë